Critical Allyship in the workplace: Finding beauty in diversity & Dissolving the status quo

Alo, Nita here. I have my own fair share of experience with homophobia and transphobia in the workplace. Gotta say it WAS FRUSTRATING..

Those personal experience inspired me to be an advocate for fellow queer and gender diverse folks. So, in this blog post I am going to share my thoughts on what it means to be an ally in the workplace and how critical allyship in the workplace may look like.

I write it from the perspective of someone who is queer who came out later in life, so I have lived on both sides of the camp of being queer and non-queer.

First thing first, what is allyship all about…

Fun fact: the word ‘ally’ originally comes from a Latin word ‘alligare’ which means “to bind to.”

An ally is someone who has your back.

They may come from a privileged position and actually leverage their privilege to stand alongside you. That’s why a true ally will stick with you through thick and thin

They do not come and go as they please.

A true ally in the workplace will back you up when you need some more support.

Allyship is an active and consistent unlearning. To be in solidarity with.

Allyship is NOT a self-proclaimed identity or a badge of honour.

Allyship is a daily practice of showing up.

A good friend (who happens to be a rad copywriter) did a deeper dive on what it means to be an LGBTQ+ ally in another article. Rather than being redundant here, why don’t you check the original version ;)

So, how does critical allyship come into play

I noticed that lots of time the discussion about allyship focuses a lot on ‘doing’ something for marginalized folks. Well, the doing itself isn’t wrong per se.

Though I felt this is where critical allyship takes this idea of allyship up a notch.

Let’s get back to basic here. When we see something breaks down, we need to pause and evaluate, so that we know what contributed to the situation…

I personally see allyship in the workplace as using your personal privilege to support your fellow co-workers who come from historically marginalized communities.

LGBTQ+ ally will show their influence by amplifying the voices, intentions, and thoughts of their underrepresented co-workers. 

I personally see allyship in the workplace as forming a mosaic of rich, diverse tapestry of relationships and culture throughout the company.

Sounds like a handful, I know. 

In what way does critical allyship take the idea of a mere allyship up a notch?!?

Some of the hiccups I heard on the ground when we talk about the concept of allyship is that some folks felt as if it is forced upon them…

Let’s say a co-worker identify as gender diverse and experiment with different pronouns and names. Without an understanding and context, it might seem as if that said co-worker may come accross as imposing their personal identity upon other folks in the office.

This is where, I kind of see the principle of critical allyship comes in handy

Critical allyship promotes listening rather than jumping straight to action

This aspect of critical allyship may at glance feels counter intuitive. It is our natural inclination to want to fix something. Though this is where, to practice critical allyship, we need to take a step back and NOT assume that we have all the answers.

Critical allyship can help us find beauty in diversity

A quick side tangent here, this reminds me of a conversation with a good friend recently about cultural diversity. For the most part we have collectivistic and individualistic cultures as the dominant culture we see on planet Earth. We were noticing this tendency of people from certain culture to try to impose their values on people from the other culture.

So we were like, wouldn’t it be beautiful if both parties can actually take what’s good from each culture and combine it. Wouldn’t it be more enriching.

I guess that is a very roundabout way of making my point about another way to look at allyship in the workplace is learning to accept differences. 

Instead of being defensive and trying to promote your way of thinking or seeing the world as ‘the best’, I personally see critical allyship in the workplace as having the openness to see where the other person comes from.

Forming your critical allyship army in the workplace

While anyone can be an ally in the workplace, typically they are colleagues who come from privileged positions like male (sex), white (skin colour), cis- heteronormative, senior or high job ranking (position) within the company.

An ally in a workplace setting typically holds more power and comes from more privileged backgrounds, so they have the ability, responsibility, and capability to choose whether or not to be an ally. 

Colleagues who identify as an ally in the workplace support their fellow colleagues from minority groups  who may not have the same advantages. They could be women of colour, personally identify as LGBTQ+, immigrants.

Critical allyship shifts the focus from ‘Let’s Do something’ to ‘Let’s get on the same page first’

Typically allyship in the workplace may have more nuances because there are some implied power dynamics at play. An ally in the workplace will speak out when they see something not quite right, so this could create an environment where everyone feels welcome which is the essence of an inclusive company culture. Allyship in the workplace will only work if there is good enough buy-in from everyone involved. Support must be consistent, and ideally flows from the top down and the bottom up.

This is where critical allyship shifts the focus to be more invitational. Active engagement and participation

Critical allyship invites folks who self-proclaimed as allies and champion of the marginalized folks to get a better understanding of WHO and WHAT they champion.

I personally see it as more well-rounded and giving autonomy to both parties!

Practicing critical allyship means moving away from the tendency to save, fix, and do something for those people who are marginalized.

The 3 essence of critical allyship:

1. Seeing and uderstanding your role in how the system of oppression creates all the inequalities for those who are marginalized

2. Learning from the expertise of peope who are traditionally marginalized. Give credit where it’s due also, if you ended up sharing what you learnt to people in your life.

3. Come alongside the marginalized folks you champion, help them build insights and mobilize actions amongst people in privileged position. Work under their leadership and let them provide the direction.

I am aware that point #3 may make it sound like I am contradicting what I mentioned previously. Though, the emphasis here is DOING things ALONGSIDE, not doing something for them…

Let’s leave you with some concrete ideas on how to practice critical allyship in the workplace to get your momentum going.

1. Critical allyship can look like: Listen more than you speak

A solid ally observes, notices things, and listens to learn. 

For example, if you have co-workers who come from indigenous backgrounds, you can initiate conversations to learn a bit more about their cultures. And perhaps explore with them how it would look like if you both were to promote special movements within your workplace during Truth and Reconciliation month in September.

One thing to note about critical allyship and listening:

I agree that there is a lot to learn, so you can start by attending community events and educating yourself on indigenous folks’ cultural practices.

(!) Do your part. Remember that it’s not the marginalized folks’ job to educate and fully transform you.

We build trust through small, intentional, thought out actions and conversations. So, start there and see where it takes you.

Trust is earned and it goes a long way.

2. Critical allyship can also look like: Share the spotlight and invite someone to come alongside you

Remember the second essence of critical allyship?!?

>>>Learning from the expertise of peope who are traditionally marginalized. Give credit where it’s due also, if you ended up sharing what you learnt to people in your life.

My personal invitation for you to put this point of critical allyship into practice is… In your next meeting at work, look around and notice who are the co-workers in your surroundings.

Are there women? What are their ages? Do you see someone who identifies as trans-, nonbinary, or agender? When you attended your professional development day, who were the panelists and keynote speakers? Is there anyone who identifies as neurodiverse?

If you happen to be a leading expert in your field or in a certain topic, the next time you’re invited to be a presenter, suggest the name of a fellow co-worker from a marginalized background instead. Their voices deserved to be heard too!

Also, if someone has done behind-the-scenes work for you or your project, openly acknowledge that in the public space.

Some folks from certain backgrounds, including myself, may not be as outspoken about our small valuable contributions. That’s why having someone who genuinely cares about lifting one another up really helps!

Does critical allyship means no more actions as LGBTQ+ allies?!?

HECK NO… This aspect of “Acknowledge and correct” LGBTQ+ allyship is still just as valid

If you hear a co-worker chronically and consistently misnaming and misgendering someone, you can show your allyship in the workplace by reminding those co-workers of the need to use the correct pronouns and names.
(!) It is exhausting after a while explaining and advocating for being mis-named and mis-gendered.

A few final reminders in showing your critical allyship in the workplace

There is no one-size-fits-all approach on how critical allyship in the workplace is supposed to look like.

There is no mold or manufacture ready-to-follow instructions to make critical allysip happen.

It is okay to admit that you don’t know the solution to every problem under the sun.

In fact, that is the essence of critical allyship. That is you don’t know, and it is okay not to know everything. And it is actually better to walk alongside someone we champion.

It is okay not to jump into actions right away.

It is our natural inclination. Though it is good to actually take a pause and listen.

Let’s shed the old way of doing things. Not because it’s bad. Though we’re just stepping into something new and there’s is beauty in trying something new.

Hello, I’m Nita Agustin

Registered Clinical Counsellor based in Burnaby, BC

My jam is helping curious and questioning queer youth and young adults move from confusion to clarity.

Most of my clients shared feeling overwhelmed by the messages the world told them how they’re supposed to be. They do not want to be defined by what society told them about themselves.

In our work together, I guide clients in figuring out who they are, who they want to be, and how to get there. We do this by processing how their past impacted the way they live out their life today. From our work together, I noticed clients develop better self-awareness and experience improved quality of life as they can show up differently in their relationships.

I offer virtual and in-person sessions in Brentwood, North Burnaby. In the summer I also offer walk-and-walk in Confederation Park.

I am licensed to practise in BC, as well as all across Canada, so I support clients all over BC, all the way from Vancouver to Kitimat. Other than working with clients who reside in BC, I also can support clients who reside in Yukon Territories, Northwest Territories, Nunavut, Saskatchewan, Manitoba, and Newfoundland.

Check out my About me page to learn more about what I do and have to offer for you. Also, explore my Services page to see how I can guide you in making shifts in your life today. If you feel ready to discover ways to live life on your own terms, I welcome you to book an initial intake session. I am so stoked to meet you and start figuring out how you can show up as your best self!

Throughout this pandemic, I witnessed telehealth virtual sessions become more of a norm, and it has been super transformative seeing clients can access mental health services from the comfort of their home.

There are lots of different stereotypes out there, and society tells us who we are supposed to be and what we are supposed to do in the world. It can feel very overwhelming and confusing to compare our personal experience against those ideas. The thing is, you no longer have to be defined by what society tells you. It is your life to live, and you get to decide who get a say about your life.